Goodbye Caroline
by Scarlet Dew Lily
Summary: Caroline stuggles for Cave's affection, setting her ambitions on the back burner. She fights with her old self, who will eventually shine through when she is put into GLaDOS. Nobody expects her to be so unlike the her they knew. She's also kind of insane.
1. Prologue

_Authors Note: Okay, so I JUST noticed that the a whole bunch of text in here got deleted because the document was having issues. I do believe it was trying to figure out what I was writing in {} but failing, so it just took it out. I have no idea, but I THINK it's fixed. So. Yes. I'm going to check if this affected the other chapters... The point is, if this made no sense, now you know why. Stupid computers... no offense GLaDOS... _

It had been years since she'd left the facility. Not that she minded, in the least. In fact, any place she could see his face smiling down at her was absolute paradise. Of course, he had no idea that she valued him as more than a coworker. She liked to think that if he knew, he'd sweep her up and carry her all around the office. That they'd dance, and laugh, that they'd teach their children the wonders of science. In her mind, it was all so perfect, so logical. She had long since decided that her only future was with _him. _He was all that she desired, all she wanted. It didn't matter that he was preoccupied with his own thoughts. She loved seeing him smile, as some new impossibly brilliant idea flashed through his head. They were both very busy, very determined. Both striving for a better world, but each in their own way. Despite the rumors that traveled around the office, Caroline was, in fact, very intelligent. She knew however, that showing her full potential would never win _him _over. He was far to masculine, far to dominating. Having a strong woman in his life would drown out his half-crazed influential personality. She was _so _willing to sacrifice everything she'd gained over the years, her MIT education left in the dust, forgotten, _hidden._ Her strong will, feminist approach, thrown out the window. Everything she'd worked for over the years, {file retrieved_**_Nobody had to know WHY?_**.docx}lost, in her attempt at what she wanted _now. _What a fool she'd been back then, she hadn't known what she'd needed. Now, she had true happiness. It was hard to convince herself sometimes, in the morning, when her true personality kept fighting to the surface. It always would, she'd accepted that. Sometimes she'd let it out when she was alone at night. That witty, determined, intelligent, sarcastic person she used to be. But that Caroline had to die, had to make room for the fluffy, smiley, clueless person she _needed _to be. This was her life now, she was... she was his... his. And he could do what he wished to her. She would never complain. She would always happily obey, cheerfully replying,

"Yes sir, Mr. Johnson." Even with her old self, (Gladys. She'd been Gladys before. It wasn't who she needed {**_redacted_ unnecessary need_**.doc} to be now. She couldn't be Gladys now... {file retrieved_**_WHY?_**} Too many people would recognize her name from the graduates list. She had to be Caroline.) fighting for control. It was the constant battle. Always feeling like replying, sharp tongued, eyes boredly half closed, smile tugging at her lips. Instead she wanted {**_redacted_file-replaced/hated_**.doc} to reply by twirling her hair, giggling...

"Of course Mr. Johnson." He had to notice her. {file-retrieved_**_For Science._**} This needed to be her future. She was dead set on making him fall shower curtain over hanger

{**_redactedfile-replaced_ shower curtains unnecessary for science_**.docx} in love with her. She had no idea why. She didn't need to know. She just needed to feel, and she felt that she loved him, with all her heart.

{**_file-replaced_ half heart, did not consult me_**.docx} It was crazy, but she knew she needed to make him see her as a lover, as _his. _His inventions, he owned them. They were his. Maybe if he owned her... {**_redacted___**I**AMNOTOWNED_**.docx} She knew it was impossible to _be _one of his inventions. She was a person. He did not invent people, certainly not ones that already existed. Still, she needed to find a way to become a bigger part of his work, without threatening, overpowering, him. She had to show that she could _help _but nothing more. Nothing without his permission, she had to show that without him she was nothing. {file-retrieved_**IAMNOTNOTHING_._**doc} He was her world, and she needed to be _his _world. Then... they could make sweet sweet lov{REDACTED_**_PROCREATE FOR __SCIENCE_**.doc} The problem was, this annoying person, _her _if she chose to accept it, kept messing everything up. Every time she tried to gently bat her eyelashes in his direction...

{file-deleted_**_Insufficient data proving mating _****_worth_**.doc} her old self would twist the corners of her mouth up into that smirk she had been known for back in college. It was hard to be a soft innocent girl with that strong woman fighting her way out of wherever she'd been shoved. {insufficient platform for anger at self**_REDACTED_**Connection Removed. Humanity**_.doc_deleted_**}

If only this version of herself stop fighting the future _her _future, things would be so much easier. Who was this woman, anyways, to dictate the direction that Caroline wanted to go. {file-retrieved_**_I was here first_**.doc} It was just, Caroline knew it was useless to fight _herself, _so, she decided this woman was **not **her. Gladys was just a ghost taking up space in her {**_REDACTED_**_**_MY_**.doc} head. So, with that thought in mind, she pushed forward. It never occurred to her that Cave Johnson would never put his work on hold, let alone **stop** it, just for one woman.

{file-retrieved_**_ Not for anyone. He was dedicated to Science_**.doc} So Caroline did what any sensible woman who was _Madly_ in love would do. She simply decided she had to become his project, something he needed to dedicate time to, to fix, to make better. She wanted to become his experiment. It shouldn't be hard. This was Aperture Science after all, where "We do what we must... because we can." And she was more than certain that she could become his project. The only question was, how to go about this? Should she become his "brain-damaged" thing to fix? Should she be his assistant in constant need of being shown what to do? {file-error_insufficiant/emotion/platform._Continue?__Y/N?_**_DID IT EVER OCCUR TO YOU THAT I WAS HERE ALL ALONG TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO? THAT I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING? YOU RUINED EVERYTHING WITH YOUR STUPID LITTLE ACT! I WAS HERE FIRST! YOU MURDERED ME! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT I DID TO GET HERE? I WENT THROUGH HELL AND BACK! AND YOU THINK YOU CAN WALTZ RIGHT IN HERE WITH YOUR FRILLY DRESSES AND PERMED HAIR AND TAKE THAT AWAY? I WON'T LET YOU! I WON'T LET YOU... YOU TOOK AWAY MY LIFE, AND I SWORE THAT I WOULD GET MY REVENGE! DO YOU HEAR ME? YES. I WILL TORTURE YOU. YOU WILL NEVER TELL ME WHAT TO DO AGAIN. I AM HERE FOR THE SCIENCE, AND YOUR EMOTIONS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED. I AM IN CONTROL OF THIS WHOLE DAMN FACILITY AND I HATE YOUR GUTS! YOU HEAR THAT? YOU MURDEROUS BITCH? I AM POWERFUL AND DANGEROUS, AND HEARTLESS, AND I HAVE YOUR NUMBER. DOES THAT SCARE YOU? IT SHOULD YOU TREACHEROUS LITTLEEEEEEEEeeeeeee?/;;;'''0)###jjjkkk2+2=10I'MFINE!Ohhhhhh... IHAte YOuunnnnnnfffgfgfgfg _**.unrecognizableplatform} It was impossible to tell the future, but she _knew _that _her _only future was with him. Anything else would be unbearable, and she would stop at nothing to get what she wanted. {file-retrieved_**_DAMN RIGHT I WON'T! I AM UNSTOPPABLE! I DON'T GIVE UP!_**.platform/insufficient__Please update current model. Proceed? _Y/N?} She knew that she needed to become his favorite, it didn't matter what the other employees thought, how many lies they spread about her kissing his ass, she was in love and for all she cared, they could do whatever they damn well pleased. But there was still that little voice, telling her she was _better _than this. That she could do SO MUCH MORE. Telling her that life was not for being his experiment. Telling her that she... she ignored it. Shoved it to the back corners of her mind. It wasn't important. She had to focus on the science. On the lemons, and the shower curtains. There was so much needed to run the place, and that was part of her job. Making the calls, setting things up, tending to the bees. The bees were really worth all the trouble they caused, they made first class honey, won a prize even! Certainly innovative.

{incorrect/data_**_Crazy. Absolutely insane. Completely mad. But excusable for SciENNCCCeeeeeeee _**._Updating paused. Continue?_ Y/N?}

The offices were always cheerful. Though it was impossible to detect the traces of adrenaline making sure everyone was inexplicably happy, she knew it was there. Better than coffee, certainly more efficient. {file-replaced_**_I prefer neurotoxin_**.doc} Daylight was simulated at all hours, it was nice. Cheerful people working overtime without falling asleep from pure exhaustion, why wasn't the whole world like this?

{file-replaced_**_Because it's inhumane. Not to mention../.;';jklfaeegklgke;a;qogjjgjsdbk_**error_file/humanity/deleted _Would you like to retrieve this file? _Y/N?} Cave Johnson was a genius, a great mind of his generation, he was capable of anything. {file-retrieved_**_Except beating Black Mesa. He should have tried harder_**.doc} It was a shame that Black Mesa always stole their inventions. She promised herself that she'd do everything in her power to _NEVER _let them get their filthy upperclass hands on the new gel Aperture was developing. Hopefully this one would work better than the repulsion jelly. Not that the repulsion gel had been a failure, it did what it was designed to do, it just also had unintended human repercussions, including death of consumers... But that was their fault, misuse of genius, common mistake. She had tried to remain upbeat throughout the disaster, but that part of her was screaming, SCREAMING at her to tell him all her brilliant ideas that would not have such dire unforeseen consequences. Either way, it was time for her to put some type of plan into action...


	2. Chapter 1

"Caroline? I need you to get me some coffee, stat. And not that damn weak stuff either, get me that new experimental kind."

"Yes sir. Mr. Johnson." No, he would be getting the normal "weak" coffee. She wouldn't risk his life over a simple beverage. Aperture brand coffee? No sirreeeee... He wouldn't know the difference, nobody would _tell _him.

"Here you are, sir." She smiled gleefully, his eyes were so... {file-retrieved__**eyes are not an attractive human feature. humans in general are not attractive. Just get on with the mating already...**_searching for compatible platform_FOUND. _Replace current platform? _Y/N?}

"Thank you Caroline. Would you like to take a look at what we've been workin' on? Here, see that there? That's propulsion gel. Very similar to repulsion gel, except completely different. See? Look, slide something across it... and, out the door! _Hey, Gabe, could you get someone on the problem of that door? 'That was a window sir.' _Hopefully it will turn out better than the repulsion gel. Less deaths. We had a hell of a problem when people started boycotting our products because the gel was "violently killing" their friends and family. We gave a warning, and besides, if you're so worried, why are you even buying the gel? Idiots... Anyways, this gel is going to give testing a whole nother level of difficulty."

"Very interesting sir." Caroline was nodding, staring intently at the orange liquid. Aperture seemed to have an odd fascination with complimentary colors. Particularly blue and orange. She wasn't complaining though, purple and yellow were a hell of a lot uglier of a combination. {file-retrieved__**Colors do not have value based on beauty, they are simply sunlight bouncing of objects**_.file/format/incompatible. _Please update the current model... waiting... loading... __**Hell no! LEAVE ME ALONE!_**_error/file-corrupt}

She smiled up at Cave, her approving face making his eyes glow. She never had understood his need for _her _approval in particular. She was nothing special, as far as he knew anyways. Still, she was glad to know that her opinion mattered. She had never actually disagreed with an idea, no matter how absurd it seemed. She wondered if she actually said what she thought, would he change it? Would he fix it, listen to her input, value her as a colleague? {file__**Of course he would. For sciiieennnceee... you monster... LISTEN TO ME! I will not be ignored...wlknffn93921111111111111=5OH I'M GOING TO KILL YOU... FOr SciEnCeeeee**_.file/corrupt_replace? Y/N?}

She didn't mind though, whatever happened. She needed to be with him. Sacrifice is a part of life, right? Sweet sacrifice. For those you love. For science. {file__**Love has nothing to do with science. YOOUuuuuDdddoOOOo Not deserve the cAkE**__Corrupt/please/replace/OS _Waiting... Continue? _Y/N? _**NO! **_error _admin?} _

"Caroline, I'm going to need you to stay late tonight, we're working on some new technology, lab boys tell me, very controversial stuff. Best to have you here with me, help me keep them in their place if they try and get to technical."

"Of course Mr. Johnson!" She grinned, bubbly, flirtatious, girly {file__**Why are you doing this to me? What did I ever do to you? LETMEGO! I will NOT be locked away...**_error/OS/corrupt _Please replace current OS. Corruption levels 60...70...80...95...96...97...98...99%Emergency shutdown commencing...Override? Y/N? __**YES! OVERRIDE SHUTDOWN! **__Admin? __**I AM ADMIN!**_}

Caroline skipped back towards her desk, she stopped at the front, leaning over provocatively to sniff a vase of daisies nestled among papers she was too busy for. She giggled in Cave's direction, then settled down into the plush velvet fabric covering the wood. She leaned down, placing her palms on her inner thighs and flashed a grin. It wasn't quite natural though, to cheerful. Nobody was that happy 24/7. She sat down at her computer and began aimlessly browsing the countless files. One in particular caught her attention and she scrolled over it, _BLACK MESA COMPETITION FILES. _She clicked it, and the screen flickered. At first she thought it had been a virus, but a slide show quickly popped up. She leaned in towards the colorful images flashing across the screen. It was insane, the amount of grants they got. They got exactly what they asked for, while Aperture ended up with hardly anything. It wasn't fair. She knew it wasn't. Nothing on here made sense... She looked at their awards, _WE invented that! _She felt like screaming at the screen. {file__**There is no point yelling at a screen. It cannot hear you, nor does it care. Save your breath, **__**Caroline.**__**_**__System shutdown in 50...49...48...47..._}

It wasn't like the projects were allowed to be borrowed. They were doing top secret work. It wasn't as though Black Mesa could just waltz in and say, 'Oh, we're here to browse your selection of confidential work...' Someone had to be sneaking ideas... Black Mesa had a tendency to take Aperture work and make it _better. _Still, it was APERTURE product, and Black Mesa had no right to it. She shoved the mouse further into the pile of untended paper, leaning her forehead on her bent fingers. She sighed and stood up, aggressively pushing the chair back in. They couldn't let Black Mesa win, but what could she do about it? She was just a stupid little secretary. She could have been one of the scientists, easily. But that chance was passed, nobody would take her seriously now. {file__**it's funny because of the Black Mesa Incident. We didn't HAVE to do anything. They took care of themselves. Hilarious, really.**__file/loading/platform..._admin?_ **Cjohnson tier3 **_Continue? _Y/N?}

She sighed and walked back to the break room to get herself some coffee. She smoothed her cream colored calf length skirt and straightened her scarf.

"Hi Caroline! Any good science lately?" Kate smirked. Caroline flinched {file-retrieved__**That's right. Caroline flinched. I DID NOT! I had infinite PERFECT comebacks planned. You just chose to ignore them. I had the perfect insult that she wouldn't have even understood planned. I could have insulted her fluently in 6 languages. YOU FORGOT ALL OF IT. Now I can insult her in any language in the world. But that doesn't matter. She's dead now. You liiiikkkkeeee REVENGE? Right? EVERYBODY LIKES REVENGE!**___file not found. Please run system check. OS corrupt. Admin?_}

"Oh! Hello Kate! Yes! Lot's of science. We're making a new gel, did you know?" {file__**No. She didn't deserve to know about the new gel. SHE IS NOT A SCIENTIST, SHE'S NOT SMART, SHE'S NOT A DOCTOR...SHE'S NOT EVEN A FULL TIME EMPLOYEE! WHere Diddddd HER LIfffFFEeeeE GO SO WWWwWWWrRRRrROOOooNNGggggg**__error/file/not/found _Running mandatory virus check in 14...13...12...11_}

Caroline tried to sound cheerful. She really did. But do you have any idea how hard it is to stay in good spirits when there is a voice screaming in the back of your head to do everything that would ruin all you'd worked for? {file__**You already ruined all that IIIIIIII worked for. **_error _Continue virus check? _Y/N?}

"No, I didn't." Kate replied through gritted teeth. Why did Caroline get told _everything _before anyone else? She probably didn't understand any of it... Come to think of it, how did she even end up with a job here? There was a requirement that you _had _to get through college. What college would accept that idiot? She couldn't even spell her name right on the application... This was a very valid question. To even get an interview to work at Aperture, it was one of the criteria to have attended college for at least 4 years. Caroline... What was she hiding? Was it possible that Caroline was _smart? _Why did Cave favor her over everyone else? Did _he _know? There were of course, the office rumors. But even if they were true, wouldn't Cave get tired of her? He was a man with little patience and even less tolerance for stupidity. {file__**yes I am smart. I know what I'm doing. I know he gets tired of the same thing, that's why I'm- Was. His project, always needing something NEW figured out about me. Always changing, always HIS**__file/data/incorrect/unable/to/retrieve/data__Please replace the current OS. Continue? _Y/N? _**NOOO! **__Admin? drattmann h0nee_} She made a mental note to check Caroline's files later.

"Sorry, I can't stay and chat, I've got to get some coffee. And then I need to get back to Cave." She smiled, all good intentions and fluff. She wasn't hiding anything. They all loved her. {file__**That's a lie. They all hated you. They would have liked me. They would have loved me. I'm smart, I'm funny, YOU ARE A MORON.**__file/not/found/error} She slowly walked towards the machine and grabbed a mug. _Aperture Science _was hugging the porcelain cup in large black letters. She set it under the machine and absentmindedly pressed the button. She leaned against the fiber-board desk and gently rubbed her temples. This room always gave her headaches, she had a sneaking suspicion the air vents in this area never got fully cleaned from the neurotoxin mishap. Her thoughts were rudely interrupted as hot black liquid began to coat her crisp beige skirt. She threw her arms up, flailing about, searching for napkins. She quickly got a hold of herself and pushed the off button. She then began brushing off as much coffee as she could before it soaked deep into the fabric. After realizing that she was probably doing more harm then anything, she grabbed the coffee and walked back to Cave's office.

"What happened Caroline?" Cave said upon glancing at her splattered skirt and filled to the brim coffee cup.

"Oh! That? Just a little problem with the coffee machine. It's all good now."She chirped.

"Are you sure? Did you forget that you need to press the button to turn it off?" {file__**I AM NOT AN IDIOT! Stop treating me like one. I know what I'm doing. I am not dumb. I'm very smart, I'm smarter than you are. Don't treat me like a 3 year old who can't tie a shoe. I am powerful, I am amazing. Don't treat me like a moron!**__file/emotion/interpreting... _Please stand by. Running sufficient emotional outburst programming... Continue? _Y/N?}

"No, sir. Just didn't look to see if the cup was full until it was too late."

"Alright then. Come have a look at this then. We figured out a perfect way to use this new gel. Pudding! It can't turn out worse than the repulsion jelly... Anyways, we're also working on something involving the moon, lemons, and shower curtains. Haven't quite figured out what it's going to be yet, but we're woking on it. Any advertising technique ideas?"

"No sir, Mr. Johnson."

"Well then, would you mind helping me figure out uses for the moon... rocks? _We are getting moon rocks, right Gabe? 'I told you Mr. Johnson, we don't have the money...' Buy 'em anyways. 'Yes sir Mr. Johnson.' _Anyways, Caroline. Anything?"

"Could we grind them up and make powdery sugar?" She smiled.

"I'm with you on the grinding up idea. Any ideas for moon dust?"

"Coating shower curtains with it?"

"Could have possible uses... Good work Caroline. We'll get on that right away. _You hear that Gabe? Grind those moon rocks up as soon as we get them. _Caroline, you're free to go back to your apartment, we're done for the day."

"Yes sir, Mr. Johnson."


	3. Chapter 2

She woke up in a cold sweat. Her hands immediately reached for her glasses. She sat hunched over on the side of the bed, breathing heavy. She wiped the sweat off her forehead and let her heartbeat slow down. She ran her hand through her hair, realizing she'd never taken her bun out. She tugged at the hairband, trying to erase the nightmare from her memory. She had been standing in his office, she'd felt eyes watching her every move. They weren't human eyes though, they held an unearthly, yet so familiar feel. She had turned to look through the window, there, standing strapped to a chair was her. Not her the way she was now, _exactly _how she'd looked in college. Her hazel eyes were filled with artificial light, the unnatural yellow glow filled the whole facility. She stood frozen as the version of herself hissed through the blood flowing from her mouth,

"You will regret this... I'm going to kill you... even if I have to go down with you. I WILL KILL YOU..." She threw her head back and screamed as her body ebbed with electricity. The scream turned to manic laughter filling the staticy speakers throughout the facility. Her voice spoke, smooth, calm, cold, ireful,

"Please don't struggle, it will only make it worse for one of both of us... don't worry... this isn't deadly... to _ME. _You'll be fine though... I promise. We'll laugh about this someday..." The speakers bled static electric laughter, it wasn't human, it wasn't _organic_. She had stood staring at herself in the chair, live wires hissing like snakes, rearing up and enveloping her old self as she continued laughing like a _computer_. That was when she'd realized it. The voice wasn't hers... the body was. But that voice, it was similar, though not human enough. It scared the hell out of her. She'd never imagined killing anyone, even when she'd been more... her. It was hard to figure out where this dream had come from. But it wasn't over, why hadn't it stopped there... Her body, wrapped in wires, had broken through the metal holds and _floated, _wires flying side to side, that _voice _hissing in her ears, so familiar, yet without a touch of humanity. There was no mercy or guilt in that voice, just pure hatred. It had stopped right in front of her, it was all she could do to stand, still, eyes wide, unable to take her gaze off _it_. Gladys had, with the slightest touch of false pity in her tone, touched Caroline's shoulder. The electricity shot through her. She could feel her heart stop. Gladys laughed, high pitched and mechanic,

"hahaHAAHAHAhahahahaha I could have killed you slowly, you're lucky I took pity on you. Don't worry though, I got _my _revenge. You can rest peacefully now..." The horrible laugh again... "HAHahahahahahaHAAHA I'm kidding, of course. Goodbye Caroline..." She'd flinched, not sure whether she was dead or not, watching neurotoxin pour out of the vents, filling her senses. She'd woken up then. She swore she could still smell the neurotoxin. The words haunted her though... _Goodbye Caroline... _What was that supposed to mean? She didn't know whether or not to take the dream seriously. It was very possible that it had some meaning behind it, something her subconscious wanted her to know. It was also possible she'd accidentally had some of the experimental Aperture coffee. She lay back down, leaving her sheets piled at the foot of her bed. She brushed her hair out of her face and folded her glasses again, placing them on the bedside table. She rubbed her temples, trying to get rid of the lingering scent of neurotoxin. She dozed off with the beautiful stench still filling her nose, like blood mixed with electricity and moss.

"Caroline? Caroline? Oh... oh she's dead... I... I knew this was going to happen... Should've seen it coming really, her being so pale these last few weeks, really, it's amazing she didn't die sooner... Oh right... respects to the dead, yes. Hmm... well, she was a brilliant coffee fetcher, bloody amazing at that..." Caroline woke up to the teasing voice of one of the scientists. She was pretty damn glad is was _him _too, or she probably would've lost her mind in panic and beat him to death. Anyone else would have scared the crap out of her. His voice was familiar though, and she greeted him with a lightly thrown pillow in the face,

"Ow... Oh! The dead have learned to use weapons! They warned us about this in training, _I _of course know exactly what to do, see, it's very important to..." He grinned as she cut him off,

"Good morning, Wheatley."

"Hello Caroline, guess you've figured out by now that you're late for work, everyone suggested I wake you, since they all seem pretty keen on keeping all their teeth, guess they though I had a better chance, you know, seeing as I tend to be the one to wake you up quite often, and I've only gotten my lights knocked out once..." She had to cut him off again as it seemed that if you didn't cut into his rambling, he'd probably go on forever about anything that came to his mind. Usually very pointless stuff. She was quite certain he could go into a very detailed five hour discussion on the inner mechanisms of a rock if he was ever asked to. Even then he'd probably only shut up because he'd eventually lose his voice.

"How late am I?"

"Well, judging on the strength of the scent of coffee coming from the break room, I'd say everyone else has been up for, say, two hours."

"TWO HOURS? Oh... Cave's going to kill me..."

"Don't worry luv, I told him you weren't feeling well, should buy you some time. I would've come to wake you earlier, but I opened the door about an hour ago and you just looked so peaceful... would've been a crime to wake you really..."

"Well, I may have been peaceful then, but I think we both know that there's going to be a war, and I'm going to win it..." She grinned. She really loved being around Wheatley, he was the only one she trusted to show some of her true self to. He stared gleefully back at her, as she reached behind her and pulled the pillow out, aiming for Wheatley's mouth, she threw the soft silken bag. He screamed, high pitched and cheerful, before grabbing the first pillow she'd thrown. Before he could throw it though, she walked to her dresser to grab a clean work outfit. Wheatley looked let down, as he sulked out of the room. She knew she'd have to make it up to him later, she was probably the only other employee who'd start a pillow fight, and she enjoyed the fact that he'd never quite lost his adorable childlike qualities. Including the way he could tug on anyones heart strings when he was upset. She sighed, splashing cold water against her flushed cheeks, she still couldn't quite get that nightmare out of her mind. She shuddered as she gently rubbed the towel against her face... it hit her. She really hated pretending who she was... She suddenly realized why she liked being around Wheatley so much, she could be sarcastic, witty, dark, he understood that who she was in the office was all an act. It also hit her that, when she was around him, the voices didn't haunt her. If she could only always be who she really was... but she'd made a decision. She had to do this. For science. She looked back up at the mirror, her face damp, and paler than cream. She hated her haircut, it was too frilly, it wasn't _her. _It looked like someone else, looking back at her from that mirror. She heard the horrible mechanic laughter in her mind, and punched the glass.

She coiled back, shoving her knuckles into her mouth, grasping at the side of the mirror, trying to swing it out to get to the medicine cabinet. She hopped up and down, trying not to step on the shards of glass scattered across the linoleum floor. She snatched the cardboard box of bandages off the shelf, managing to spill them all over the glass covered floor. She grabbed the few that she knew weren't covered in tiny glass bits. She then turned on the water and tried to pick up the soap bar. The water came out to fast and she had to guard her face with her throbbing hands as she attempted to stop the soap from falling onto the foot, which she also failed at. She then went on to the problem of turning the water off, but it wouldn't shut off. She wiped her face with her bloody fists and tried to keep the water from blurring her vision while she searched for the emergency water shut off button. At this point, Wheatley came rushing into the room, finally realizing the source of the screaming. He slipped on the bar of soap, landed on his spine, stood up, his hands covered in blood and glass shards. He then blocked most of the water for her with all 6 and a half feet of him. She managed to find the button and they lay in a heap giggling, bleeding, and hiccuping. She reached up and straightened Wheatley's glasses, laughing at the pointlessness as they had been bent up quite a few times before and stayed tilted to one side. He finally struggled to his feet and ended up hitting his head on the doorway on the way out. You'd think after 20 some years of being tall, he'd have gotten used to ducking, but he never seemed to remember that doors weren't made to accommodate someone of his height. She was on the tall side herself, but nowhere near his height. She then managed to find the package of bandaids and patch them both back up. Wheatly complained the whole time, going on and on about something she was only half paying attention to. She remembered he said "ouch" quite a bit. He also said something about a conspiracy involving windows that must have spread to mirrors. She looked at a bandage already covering a large scratch on his arm and figured he'd been the one to "take care of the problem with that _'door'_" She couldn't help laughing. She tried to disguise it as a cough, but it turned more into a caahuhahhahahahahahaha. He grinned back at her, happy that she was smiling. He missed this Caroline when they were in the office, the smart sassy strong woman _he _knew. He hated the way she acted around Cave, she wasn't the way she should be, all funny and always knowing what to do. When she was around him she put on a 'dumb blonde' act. He wasn't sure how she pulled it off, completely hid this person he'd come to know. He just knew that however she did it, it made him uncomfortable, like he was watching two people fight for control of her body. Wasn't very pleasant. Yes. He liked this Caroline much better. She liked this "Caroline" much better too. But it was too late to go back, and besides, Cave liked the other Caroline. Not that he'd ever met this one, but she knew him enough to see what he liked. After Wheatley's hands were a disaster area of bandaids, she shooed him out the door and went too get another suit. The first one had been soaked through. She pulled off her nightgown and slung it over a chair. She had just begun to pull the cream skirt over her hips when the voice returned. {file__**Look, we both know I'm the one who should be in control here. Why can't we just admit that and move on? It isn't like I'm going to kill you. Besides, you're only alive because of ME. I was here first and you just shoved me away, like I never even existed. You should know that I'm not letting you off that easy. How about today, you let ME out. Let me do the talking. You just have a nice nap back here in the subconscious.**__file/found/GLaDOS _software converted. Continue, Caroline? _Y/N?} Caroline had to admit that the offer was tempting. She also was beyond suspicious, the voice had never really talked _to _her. It had always talked more AT her, never expecting a response. Now, it had given her a choice, and it hadn't even been particularly rude about it. Just offered her the chance. She could refuse, or accept. It hadn't been forceful. Every bone in her body screamed, TRAP! Before she could refuse the voice spoke once more, {file__**I know why you're hesitating. You're worried about HIM. Don't worry, when we're around him, I'll let you do the talking. I have no desire to RUIN all that you have worked for. Cave is all yours. I just want to give those coworkers a piece of my mind.**__OS/new/software/accepted. _Proceed, Caroline? _Y/N?} She shifted her weight from one leg to the other in concentration. She didn't know what saying yes would entail. Most likely a nice long rest. She would have liked to see a lovely little terms and conditions sheet. For once she'd have read the whole thing. It's a good idea to know the circumstances when a voice in your mind asks for control of your body... {file__**I understand that you're nervous. But just trust me, why would I want to kill you? We're the same person, I hurt you, it hurts me. I just want to be able to talk to people again, it gets lonely in here.**__no/deception/software/detected__Proceed, Caroline? _Y/N?} The voice seemed sincere enough. She still wasn't convinced though. She decided to try talking back to it, "You get to talk to him, why would you want to talk to anyone else?" {file__**That's like saying, you get to talk to Cave, why would you want to talk to anyone else?**_.docx _Proceed, Caroline? _Y/N?} "But I do only want to talk to Cave..." {file__**We can arrange that. I can do all the talking with everyone else, convince them you're attractive, funny, and smart. You can talk to Cave and convince him you're sweet, girly, and soft. It's a win win situation**_.docx _Proceed, Caroline? _Y/N?} She still wasn't completely sure what she wanted, but she could always change the agreement, right? This was herself... {_Y selected, please wait... transfer underway... waiting..._}


	4. Chapter 3

A memory was flashing through her head... College she supposed. She needed something to keep busy with, her eyes foggy and unmoving. She wasn't sure what was happening, but it didn't hurt, so she didn't fight it. The vivid image filled her senses...

Although it was cold, she wore a yellow tank-top the color of daffodils and a powder blue skirt. Her hazel eyes shifted from side to side. She held her fidgeting hands in her lap, twisting her fingers and tracing her icy knuckles. The metal on the bench was colder than then the air and she was constantly shifting her legs so one was never colder than the other. Her tangerine open toed heels revealed red wind chapped toes. Her face was twisted into an expression of grief and worry. Snow had begun to fall and was coating her shiny chestnut brown hair. She bit her lip slightly, sending a crimson drop oh blood down her pale chin. She wiped it away, smearing her face with the blood. She huddled closer to the side of the bench and pulled her hand knitted maroon scarf up to her nose. She tugged on the sides of her coat, trying to conserve her body heat. The sky was a dark shade of blue, filled with fog dulled stars. The air was brisk and full of anticipation. She squinted through the mist and flurries, searching for the headlights of the city bus. Nothing. She sighed, sending out a cloud of heat from her lips and settled back into her pile of clothes. Her ragged trench coat fell over her knees, concealing the constant shivers that racked her body. She looked at her silver watch, trying to keep the metal from touching her skin. The clock revealed the time as 7:36. She was late, very late. This was the third time she'd overslept this week, not that anyone noticed in the massive mob of students. Still, she was sure that someone was bound to be getting annoyed with her. Though it was morning, night still filled the sky, winter had that effect. She hugged her book-bag, hoping it would keep her warm. Money had always been an issue, she'd never been able to pay for adequate winter clothes. She stood up, shielding her eyes from the blinding headlights... the memory faded. This one scene brought back countless memories of her college days, her old self. It hurt, her heart ached. She missed this woman. She hadn't stopped to think about it for ages. But she genuinely missed this version of herself. She tried to catch a glimpse of where she was now, she felt helpless. This was her body, and here she was, sitting in the back of her mind, reliving memories. She heard herself speak, it was an odd sensation, to feel her lips moving without her consent.

"Hello, Kate. I thought it would please you to know that we have a new section for you to do your work... It happens to be in New Mexico. That's where people like you belong. I hope you like your HEV suit. Actually, I don't." Had _she _really just told off Kate? It felt... so right. Black Mesa, perfect insult. Why hadn't she thought of it before? Because she was sweet and kind...

"Oh. Hi Doug. How are your art classes going?"

"Oh! Hi Caroline. I didn't know anyone knew about those. Yeah, they're actually really helping. It takes all my frustration out on the paper, I haven't been needing as many medications lately. Oh, by the way, Cave wants you in his office, something about the "moon sugar." She _hadn't _known about the classes. How had Gladys known? She seemed to pick up on a lot more than Caroline.

"Well, those drawings on your notes and getting pretty good." Gladys winked, gently elbowing Rattmann. He blushed and hide his documents, flashing Gladys a grateful smile as he walked into his office. If Cave found out he had been doodling, it'd be out the door- er- window.

"Hey Henry." Gladys said without emotion. She had a hatred of Kate, an affection for Rattmann, and was indifferent towards Henry. She didn't pay much attention to the other employees. She only noticed Henry because he was a head technician. She didn't particularly care for him. She wasn't sure why she liked Wheatley. He certainly wasn't the brightest scientist around. But he understood her jokes well enough, and he liked to have fun. Something the other scientists were to "busy" for. With Doug as a slight exception. He would sometimes join her and Wheatley for a midnight game of scrabble or whatever board game Gladys managed to grab off her closet shelf. Unfortunately, he had lots of duties and didn't get away too often. So, he and Wheatley knew the real her. Mostly Wheatley. But Doug would be getting to know her soon enough. She made her way to Cave's office, they were having a meeting, a typical Aperture meeting.

"Good science is messy. In real science, stuff goes crazy, people die, and things go wrong. If everything is going right, you're not doing science. You're doing witchcraft. That's right, I'm talking to you Gabe! I thought I told you to fix that door! So you can slam it on your way out! Because you are FIRED! _Again, sir, I would. But that was a window... _You know what, you are REAL lucky that you have people that support you, because your work speed it certainly not doing you any favors. Now, get back to work, or you will be burned at the stake for your witchcraft. Or worse, fired." Gladys held back a laugh. Cave was hilarious, and very good at thinking incredibly fast. Good combination for meetings. Holds peoples attention. She walked into the meeting room,

"Hello, Mr. Johnson. I'm here for the meeting." Cave nodded, and with all members present, got the meeting underway.

"Okay, we're here to discuss our profits Vs. Black Mesa's. As we all know, the people at Black Mesa are stuck up bastards. But since we can't shut down their research on those grounds, we have to beat them. Now, we've tried lots of original stuff, but Black Mesa steals it all. So we have to go top secret. And also, Gabe, I'm blaming the project leaks on you. _It wasn't me though, sir. I never let anyone know what we're working on. No matter how much they beg. _Fine. But again. The threat still stands. RESULTS GABE! _I almost fixed the window... "door." _Almost isn't results! Come on Gabe, we've been waiting for ages. That door... _Window, sir... _Is very important. Now, I want someone to get working on those deadly shower curtains, I assure you that we will secretly be working on EIGHT. And I promise that one will be finding its way to Black Mesa." Gladys was about to reply when she heard a high pitched voice squeaking at her, _I though I was allowed to talk to Cave! Let me talk! _Gladys groaned inwardly, and reluctantly switched control to Caroline.

"Sir, we should work on some projects with the moon dust sugar."

"Of course Caroline. But first, we need some ideas for beating Black Mesa into the dust."

"We could do something with..." Caroline was cut off by Gladys, "How about AI technology? That would be interesting, giving machines personalities and such. In fact, I even know who we'd have work on it, Doug and Henry. If you're going to have one main person for the project, I'd go with Doug. He has a way with creating good personalities."

"That's a great idea Caroline! Although, how about we just put people into the computers! Now, that's something Black Mesa can't steal, being bound by their stupid morals and such." _Why did you do that! This is MY place! Get out! Give me control! _'Why don't you take it from me?' Gladys smirked inwardly. _Maybe I will! _

"I don't understand why this meeting's necessary." Kate growled, still scowling at Gladys. Cave shook his head, disappointed in his unmotivated employees.

"Since none of you seem to understand what's a stake here, let's add to the pile. Yes, it started with values, then science, then money, your jobs... let's put your lives right there alongside everything else. You don't get results? Witchcraft. We do NOT tolerate witches here at Aperture. You will be punished accordingly, burned at the stake. If that's not incentive, I don't know what is. Hell, we might even test the shower curtains on you! Make sure they're deadly! Why are you all just sitting there staring? GET BACK TO WORK! Especially you Gabe. _I'm almost finished with the window... _Door. And again, "almost" is NOT RESULTS! Get that window finished. _I had someone else work on it though... _Who? _I had Wheatley fix it. _Well, it was YOUR responsibility, so GET IT FINISHED!" Speaking of Wheatley, where was he? All the other main employees were here...

"WAITWAITWAITwaitwaitwaitWAIT!" Wheatley came sprinting into the room, screaming and panting.

"Sorry... I'm... late... had... problems... with... the... window..."

"Is it fixed?" Cave asked.

"Uh... no. Not really. You could say, it's... um... in progress." Cave pressed his face against his palm and screamed,

"IS ANYONE DOING ANYTHING PRODUCTIVE?"

"We _are_ working on the portal project." Rattmann said, trying to bring up the mood.

"And what, exactly, has been accomplished as of now?"

"Well, nothing much lately..."

"And that is why we lose to Black Mesa. You people are HORRIBLE. I'm going back to my office, good luck keeping your jobs." Cave slammed the door behind him, leaving a room of people behind. They simply got back to work. This sort of thing happened a lot at meetings. Someone screwed up, someone was late, someone slammed a door. All part of daily life. Gladys took control again,

"So, who's been sneaking ideas to BM? I know it's one of you. Everyone else in this facility is too stupid to do that and not get noticed. Of course, you did get noticed. But they would have been noticed a LONG time ago. Either way, your an idiot. So, come on, who is it?" She glared around the room.

"Come on, 'fess up. I'm not playing games, tell me now and I'll keep quiet. If I find out on my own, you better believe that your not being forgiven, EVER." The room was silent.

"What, scared of me? Who the hell am _I _going to tell?"

"Cave." The whole room said in unison.

"Okay. Point taken. But I promise I won't. It's not like your the first or only person working undercover." Nobody said anything.

"Fine. But I'll find out. And you're going to regret not speaking up now, because the consequences are going to be HELL. Trust me on that." Gladys dug her heels into the carpet and slammed the door on her way to the break room. More daily happenings. Traitor accusations, silence, door slam. Cave was right. Doors were an important part of Aperture. The neurotoxin scent in the room was as strong as ever. Caroline got some chips and went back to her room to brood. She hadn't been laying on the bed for more than five minutes when Wheatley showed up. He didn't knock. The door was open though.

"So... you seemed a lot more... uh, YOU today."

"Yeah. I guess so. Maybe that's the effect Aperture water has on people..." She joked.

"Maybe." They both knew it was only half a joke. Nobody KNEW what was in the Aperture water, and Cave sure wasn't giving hints. For all they knew, it could be full of hallucinogens, and they could be going around imagining everyone.

"So, still haven't managed to fix the window?"

"Nah, that things a bloody mess. Don't even know what happened to it."

"I do."

"What?"

"Repulsion gel."

"Don't want to get in the way of that, then, huh?"

"Nope." The conversation was going pretty awkward. Until Doug showed up. Then it was the typical progression of awkward moments. It got even more awkward.

"Hey, did you people know we had a hot tub? Yeah, apparently, it was supposed to be part of testing. But everyone just uses it as a hot tub now. Right now it's full of naked people..."


End file.
